my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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