Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
