are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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