My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
