Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
