I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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