oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
