Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
