i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
