You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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