So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
