She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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