U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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