My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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