god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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