Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Walk of Shame today included voting.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We are all done wearing pants today
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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