Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You're earring is so big in my mouth
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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