Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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