Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
