was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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