Please, let me fuck your mom
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
