nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
