also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
