She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Non-Jews are for practice
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Randomize
