I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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