New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
