Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
