I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Can you bring me the toilet please
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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