they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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