bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
