it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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