its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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