what if every blade of grass was a penis?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
