i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
