remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
