That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
