Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
