I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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