I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
