pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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