We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
