to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
