Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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