this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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