whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
