Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
