whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
