I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Small penises have feelings too.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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