I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
