Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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